If one wanted to introduce a daily question on a morning walk or car ride and make a Socratic dialog a routine, where would one go looking for inspiration for conversation starter questions for a four year old?
But one way to think about it is to try to understand the world through the child's understanding. For instance, while in the car,
1. Are cars faster than people? Why?
2. How do you think cars work?
3. Why does the air move when we open the windows while driving?
4. Why is the air still while the windows are up?
5. Could you build a car?
6. If you build a car from legos, how is it different from our car? How is it similar?
7. What is your favorite way to travel?
8. Would you want a flying car?
9. Do you like planes better than cars?
10. Do you look forward to riding a bicycle?
11. How do you think kids can ride a bicycle when it only has two wheels? Why don't they fall over?
And so forth. Many, perhaps most, of the questions may fall flat. But I like to try out many questions to see what gets traction, then go from there.
Sometimes kids don't like open ended questions (it seems like a matter of personality and their level of safety in exploring). In which case I might ask something more concrete that they are already good at - How high can you count? Then can you count by twos? And so forth. Sometimes letting them get concrete answers right can build their confidence and a casual pattern of conversation that can then be used as a foundation for later on exploring more open ended questions.
You can also explore more metacognitive questions:
1. Why was that question hard for you?
2. Do you like hard questions or easy questions?
3. What is an example of a hard question? An easy question?
4. Do you think adults like hard questions?
5. Do you think all questions are easy for adults?
6. Why would some questions be hard for adults?
Another simple formula is to think of questioning as a form of concept teaching. The way I like to think of concept teaching is as:
1. Example A
2. Example B
3. Example C
4. Counter Example A
5. Borderline Case A
For instance,
Is a puppy a dog?
Is a dachshund a dog?
Is a German Shepard a dog?
Is a cat a dog?
Is a wolf a dog?
And in each case you can ask "why" and ask them to explain.
This works for more abstract concepts as well:
1. If you borrow a toy from a friend is it fair for them to ask for it back?
2. If I get a piece of cake it is fair to give you one as well?
3. If you and your friend are together and somebody gives you both a piece of candy is that fair?
4. Is it fair if another kid takes your toy away from you without asking?
5. Is it fair for an older person to get a bigger piece of birthday cake than a little kid?
And so forth. That one is sometimes tricky, because kids often have a much stronger sense of "unfair" than "fair." But you get the idea.
So any questions about how things work (which are often really hard) or any question about nouns following a pattern of examples, anti-examples, and borderline cases.
Above all, play with it, have fun with it, keep the tone light and enjoyable. Your child should feel a sense of love, curiousity, and empathy coming from you. The emotional tonality is most important. If they experience it as enjoyable attention from you, they'll put up with a lot of scrambling as you gain experience asking questions. Conversely, if their experience is that the adult is angry, impatient, frustrated, etc. then it is no longer an enjoyable experience and they will want to avoid it.
Michael has a bunch of videos with Alana and more that he links to that have conversations with 4-5yo.
I personally find it most rewarding to talk about whatever I know excites my child and they are engaged in at the time. It could be breakfast, outerspace, happiness or poopy. Sometimes it's all four at the same time.
If one wanted to introduce a daily question on a morning walk or car ride and make a Socratic dialog a routine, where would one go looking for inspiration for conversation starter questions for a four year old?
Yes, you can look at my playlist with Alana at 4 here,
https://www.youtube.com/@SocraticMichaelStrong/playlists
But one way to think about it is to try to understand the world through the child's understanding. For instance, while in the car,
1. Are cars faster than people? Why?
2. How do you think cars work?
3. Why does the air move when we open the windows while driving?
4. Why is the air still while the windows are up?
5. Could you build a car?
6. If you build a car from legos, how is it different from our car? How is it similar?
7. What is your favorite way to travel?
8. Would you want a flying car?
9. Do you like planes better than cars?
10. Do you look forward to riding a bicycle?
11. How do you think kids can ride a bicycle when it only has two wheels? Why don't they fall over?
And so forth. Many, perhaps most, of the questions may fall flat. But I like to try out many questions to see what gets traction, then go from there.
Sometimes kids don't like open ended questions (it seems like a matter of personality and their level of safety in exploring). In which case I might ask something more concrete that they are already good at - How high can you count? Then can you count by twos? And so forth. Sometimes letting them get concrete answers right can build their confidence and a casual pattern of conversation that can then be used as a foundation for later on exploring more open ended questions.
You can also explore more metacognitive questions:
1. Why was that question hard for you?
2. Do you like hard questions or easy questions?
3. What is an example of a hard question? An easy question?
4. Do you think adults like hard questions?
5. Do you think all questions are easy for adults?
6. Why would some questions be hard for adults?
Another simple formula is to think of questioning as a form of concept teaching. The way I like to think of concept teaching is as:
1. Example A
2. Example B
3. Example C
4. Counter Example A
5. Borderline Case A
For instance,
Is a puppy a dog?
Is a dachshund a dog?
Is a German Shepard a dog?
Is a cat a dog?
Is a wolf a dog?
And in each case you can ask "why" and ask them to explain.
This works for more abstract concepts as well:
1. If you borrow a toy from a friend is it fair for them to ask for it back?
2. If I get a piece of cake it is fair to give you one as well?
3. If you and your friend are together and somebody gives you both a piece of candy is that fair?
4. Is it fair if another kid takes your toy away from you without asking?
5. Is it fair for an older person to get a bigger piece of birthday cake than a little kid?
And so forth. That one is sometimes tricky, because kids often have a much stronger sense of "unfair" than "fair." But you get the idea.
So any questions about how things work (which are often really hard) or any question about nouns following a pattern of examples, anti-examples, and borderline cases.
Above all, play with it, have fun with it, keep the tone light and enjoyable. Your child should feel a sense of love, curiousity, and empathy coming from you. The emotional tonality is most important. If they experience it as enjoyable attention from you, they'll put up with a lot of scrambling as you gain experience asking questions. Conversely, if their experience is that the adult is angry, impatient, frustrated, etc. then it is no longer an enjoyable experience and they will want to avoid it.
Thank you so much!! Super helpful -- I just sent this to my husband :)
Michael has a bunch of videos with Alana and more that he links to that have conversations with 4-5yo.
I personally find it most rewarding to talk about whatever I know excites my child and they are engaged in at the time. It could be breakfast, outerspace, happiness or poopy. Sometimes it's all four at the same time.